"Maria ... I Just Met a Cheese Named Maria"

Okay, so I don’t know if there is a cheese named “Maria” but I do know there is a storm named Maria which could be a potential threat to the Bahamas.   So far the forecast is leaning in our favour – she should be a gutter ball - but I can’t get that song out of my mind. 

Really.

Every time I visit the storm site, there she is and damn it if that song doesn’t pop into my head.

If you think about it, Maria is kind of a cheesy song anyway.

Speaking of cheese …

I’ve neglected my monthly Cheese Calendar reviews* and in order to get my mind off Maria - the storm, not to mention the song - I now update you with my late reviews of the July and August recipes for the calendar.

*(If you are new to my blog and have no idea what I'm talking about, click here to get a general understanding of the Cheese Calendar, or just click on the 'cheese calendar' label below.)

Kiwi Mascarpone  (July)

Ingredients:

• 6 kiwis (the fruit kind – not actual New Zealanders, unless your into that sort of thing)
• 1/3 cup orange juice
• ¼ cup mascarpone cheese
• 1 tsp honey
• ¼ tsp cinnamon

 Directions:

• Peel and slice the kiwis into rounds.  Sprinkle orange juice over fruit and set aside.
• In a small bowl, mix mascarpone, honey and cinnamon until well blended.
• Layer kiwis and mascarpone into ramekins 3 times, ending with kiwis.  Sprinkle tops with a pinch of cinnamon.

Oh, yum!  This would make a great dessert for any meal.  It’s not very heavy on the “cheese” taste but the mascarpone, with the honey and the cinnamon, compliments the kiwis very nicely.  It would also be an appropriate dessert for the following recipe.

Note:  If you are going to use the other Kiwis (real New Zealanders), just make they have been washed and are clean shaven, substitute the orange juice with a hot tub full of Orange Jello, whipped cream for the mascarpone and ... oh, never mind.

Goat Cheese Quesadillas  (August)

Ingredients:

• 2 tblsp extra virgin olive oil, divided
• ½ pound fresh asparagus, cut into 1 ½ inch pieces
• Two 10-inch flour tortillas (I used three 8-inch tortillas)
• 4 oz herbed goat cheese (or slightly more if you use the 8-inch wraps)
• ½ cup cooked ham, cubed (I used Black Forest ham, cut into quarter-inch cubes)

Directions:

• In a skillet, heat 1 tblsp of olive oil over medium-low heat.  Add the asparagus, stirring occasionally until tender and lightly browned.**  Add salt and pepper to taste.  Set aside.
• Spread one side of each torilla with ½ of the goat cheese.  Spread ½ the asparagus and ½ of the cooked ham cubes evenly on each tortilla.  Fold tortilla in half over contents.  Brush the outsides of the quesadillas with remaining oil.
• Over medium-high heat, cook the quesadillas about 2 to 3 minutes per side.  Cut in half and serve.

**Note:  I sometimes cannot get very fresh asparagus (as it was in this case), so I lowered the heat a bit, added a tablespoon of water and covered the skillet with a lid to steam the asparagus to prevent them from drying out.

Yum, again!  This is a simple, easy peasy recipe if you don’t want to do a lot of cooking, especially in the summertime.  The ingredients are simple (and I did adhere to the recipe), but one can always add other stuffings or seasonings to taste.  I also liked the bit of crunch that came from toasting the wraps in the skillet.

Well, that wraps up these recipes.  September's recipe is apple Camembert stuffed crepes.

It's All Greek To Me

"GOOD MORNING NORTH AMERICA!!!!"

(be thankful this isn't an audioblog)

After this long weekend, everything is probably "all Greek" to many of those on both sides of the border strugging with their hangovers.

Heh, heh.

Ah, yes, this is my usually late monthly instalment of the We Work For Cheese cheese calendar recipe review.   June's recipe was Greek Salad which I had, in fact, neglected to make but as recipes go, salad is as salad does.  It ain't rocket science and it's all about the dressing anyway.

Since it's likely to get hotter here throughout the summer, I will probably make this salad for a main course.  Although our appetites diminish as the mercury rises, the need to feed does not so this would make a nice light dinner with some bread and maybe some gestapo gazpacho and a fine Chianti.

Greek Salad

The Dressing:
1 tblsp olive oil
1 tblsp red wine vinegar
1 tblsp lemon juice
1/2 tsp dried oregano
1 clove garlic (although the recipe wasn't wasn't specific, I'm assuming it is to be crushed or minced)
1/2 tsp honey
pepper to taste

The Vegetation:
Romaine lettuce
1 tomato
1 small cucumber
1/2 green pepper


The Garnish:
1/2 cup feta cheese, crumbled
fresh dill, chopped
12 black olives (pitted if you prefer and I do prefer pitted) - chopped, or not.


Destructions:

• Wash and dry hands - preferably with soap.
• Wash and dry lettuce - preferably without soap.
• Chop The Vegetation, place in a large bowl and toss to combine.
• In a small jar, combine all of the ingredients listed for The Dressing and shake well (it's less messy if you affix a lid to the jar or container prior to shaking).  I usually set my dressing aside for a bit to mind meld.
• Pour The Dressing over The Vegetation and toss again for even dressing distribution.  Hey, toss your hair while your add it, just make sure it stays out of The Vegetation.
• Sprinkle The Garnish atop each serving.
• Eat.

Note:  Windex is NOT an ingredient.

Yeah, I took a little liberty with this recipe but not with the ingredients.  Double-up The Dressing in the event you have to double-up on The Vegetation.  And since this is just a salad, anything goes.  I prefer Caesar salad but, hey, it's all Greek to me.

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I Could Quiche You!

Due to technical difficulties with Blogger, the recent heat wave we are presently incurring and my usual lazy ass self (upon which I blame the heat), I am just now posting my review of last month's Cheese Calendar Recipe. For those of you not familiar with these recipe reviews, please click on the "cheese calendar" label at the bottom for the history of these reviews because, frankly, I'm just too hot and bothered (and not in a good way) to do the links.

At any rate, May's recipe called for a quiche - namely, a bacon quiche. Now, I'm not a great fan of eggs in the first place but the recipe calls for, basically, scrambled eggs with bacon, cheese and baked in a pie crust. I like scrambled eggs. I like bacon. I like pie crust. Oh, and I like cheese. A no-brainer!

It’s a very simple recipe and great for a brunch and would even suit as a dinner entrée for those who want protein without having to mess around with too much cooking after a long days’ work. Oh, and did I mention it has BACON!

Bacon Quiche

Ingredients:

• 6 eggs, beaten
• 12 (or more) slices of cooked bacon, crumbled
• ½ cup of milk
• 1 tsp dried basil
• 1 cup grated Havarti cheese
• 1 deep dish pie crust (in the frozen section of your grocery store – or, hell, make one yourself!)
• salt & pepper to taste

Directions:

• Preheat oven to 375 degrees
• Beat eggs, milk, bacon, salt, pepper and basil until frothy
• Pour mixture into pie crust
• Sprinkle cheese over mixture
• Bake for 35 – 45 minutes or until knife inserted into centre comes out clean

That is the basic recipe in the calendar but you could dress it up anyway you want. For instance, the bacon they sell here is very fatty, rather expensive and without much flavour (yeah, it sometimes sucks to live in the Bahamas – we get all the crappy food) but you could use a nice pancetta or capocollo (spicy or not) or some other flavourful meat.

Even though I made this dish to the specifications of the recipe (as I promised to do with all of recipes in the calendar), I would likely add sweet peppers, onions and some Worcestershire sauce.  As it is a quite versatile recipe, one could use it for those leftovers that won't make a full meal.

So, guys, real men can eat quiche.
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Potatoes Ugh Rotten

Late last year I won a cheese recipe calendar from the wonderfully cheesy people at the site formerly known as We Work For Cauliflower, hosted by Nicky, Mike and - occasionally - Jepeto and in honour of such honour, I declared I would make the recipe that correlated with each month and write a review of same.

It’s April and this month's cheese calendar recipe is "Potatoes Au Gratin" (for those of you who are not familiar with the French language, it is pronounced - more or less - "potatoes aw-grat-eh" and not as indicated in the title of this post). And I’m so proud that I have beaten the end-of-the-month review publishing deadline that I had imposed upon myself.

Yay me!

I had a few little problems with this recipe.  First and foremost was the cheese – no such animal exists on this rock – but the substitute (as suggested by Nicky) is just as good.  Secondly, I did not have, nor could I find, the potatoes that were called for in the recipe. No worries – I used a ‘cousin’ spud which worked just fine. Thirdly, the size of the casserole dish seemed a little large and I thought there might have been a typo. I was so wrong.  I now have a bowl full of potato slices wallowing in water in my fridge, awaiting their fate to one of my many other torturous cooking methods.

The most fretful part of this recipe is – at least for me – that it calls for “thinly sliced” ingredients. Since no one here personally knows me, I love to cook but I am an absolute klutz when it comes sharp objects, particularly knives. So to avoid possible future visits to the E.R. (which I have done quarterly on several occasions in Canada - something one would wish to avoid here), I previously purchased a mandolin – and no, it is not the stringed instrument so don’t even try to play Going to California on one.  It was definitely worth the price (an upper end model), even though I once almost sliced off the entire end of one of my pinkie fingers.

Moving on.

This is a very simple recipe, very tasty and would make a great side for any main entrée. So, without further adieu, I present:

Potatoes Au Gratin

Ingredients:

• 3 tblsp butter
• 2 leeks (white and light green parts only), thinly sliced *
• 8 Yukon gold potatoes, peeled and thinly sliced **
• 7 oz. Oka cheese ***
• salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.
• In a skillet, sauté leeks in butter with salt and pepper, stirring occasionally until softened – about 12 minutes. Scrape into bowl and set aside (yeah, right, like I need another dish to clean – just get it off the heat and leave it in the pan until you need it).
• Generously butter (or grease) the bottom of a 10-cup casserole dish. Layer ¼ of the potatoes along the bottom, then spread ¼ of the leek mixture on top. Repeat layering 3 times. Cover with foil.
• Bake on bottom rack of oven until potatoes are tender (about 1 and ½ hours).
• Remove (cut) rind off cheese and slice into thin pieces.
• When potatoes are tender, remove from oven, increase temperature to 450 degrees, cover potatoes with cheese.
• When the oven has reached the higher temperature, bake potatoes (uncovered) until cheese is bubbly and lightly browned, about 5 to 10 minutes.

*Sometimes leeks collect soil or sand in between their shoots (or leaves) as they grow. It has been suggested that you wash them before cooking: cut the shaft lengthwise to loosen the leaves and rinse in water. For this recipe, I used three leeks instead of two – even though they taste like onions, they aren’t nearly as strong but I liked the extra ‘oomph’.

**Since I could not find the Yukon golds, I just used red potatoes. And as for peeling them, forget about it (unless you don’t like the skins) – the skins are full of vitamin C, so just scrub your potatoes well if you don’t want to peel them.

***As I indicated, we do not get Oka cheese here but I found that Gruyere is an excellent substitute.

If you use all the potatoes called for in the recipe, you will need that larger casserole dish.  Personally, I like a crispy top on such dishes and used a rectangular vessel and tried to toast the potatoes before I added the cheese.  Unfortunately the visualisation électroniques foutues (pardonnez mon francais) on my oven heated up and I was unable to read the temp, resulting in slightly overcooked cheese and a overly crisp bottom (not top).  I really gots to gets me a gas range.  Next time I'll just use the broiler.

I vowed to myself that I would cook each recipe of the calendar as it is written (other than necessary substitutions) and so far each recipe is quite good on its own, but there is always room for tweaking if you should feel the need.  I normally use onions in my potato casseroles.  The leeks, though, have a milder flavour and I will probably use them more often.

Next month:  Bacon Quiche  (Does anyone remember, "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche"?  Yeah, right.  If there's bacon involved, they'll eat it!)

;-)

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Attack Of The Killer Zucchinis!

In case any of you were not aware, late last year I won a cheese calendar from some fellow Canadiens at We Work For Cauliflower Cheese, in which contains cheese dishes for each month throughout the year.  And, as usual - yet still living up to my job description - I am late in posting my review of March's mozzarella meltdown.  Okay, so there is no mozzarella involved in this month's recipe but there was melted cheese.
 
The recipe for March called for zucchini as the main suspect ingredient.  The only reason I am publishing this article sooner than my lackadaisical ass generally allows is because I am, apparently, deathly allergic to this seemingly benign widow vegetable.   I've been told that I have only a few days to live.

My Grassy Knoll Bullet

(Heh, heh)


Okay, I missed April Fool's Day too.   So I'm three days late and too many dollars short.  Sue me.
 
Anyway, this is a wonderful springtime recipe, extremely simple and very versatile.  It can be served as an entree or an appetizer and leftovers make an excellent starter base for a cheese sauce.

Creamy Zucchini Soup

Ingredients:

• 1 onion (approx. silver dollar sized or slightly larger)
• 2 pounds chopped zucchini
• 2 cups water or chicken broth (I went with the broth)
• salt & pepper to taste
• fresh dill to taste
• 3 to 4 triangles of Vache Qui Rit cheese (Laughing Cow, Boursin or cream cheese)

Directions:

1. Simmer onion and zucchini in water/broth for about 15 min. or until tender (you don't have to peel the zucchini)
2. Puree in a food processor or blender (I used a "Daily" hand mixer right in the pot  - really, who needs more dishes to clean?)
3. Add cheese, salt and pepper (and dill - I didn't have any and omitted it since I don't like it)
4. Stir until cheese has melted

That's it.  Easy peasy simple.

Oh, right.  The cheese sauce:  If you have some leftover soup, just add some extra cheese (any type will do), some extra broth or milk if it becomes too thick, and other seasonings to taste.  It's great over steamed broccoli, cauliflower, boiled potatoes or anything else you like dressed with cheese sauce - even peas (yeah dufus, I'm lookin' at you!).

Enjoy!


Some of you may be wondering why "pumpkin" is included in the labels for this post.  While I was looking for pictures of zucchini, I came across this:

(I think this might have been found at Charlie Brown's house)

Some time ago I participated in a weekly writing challenge hosted by a fellow blogger,  Jenny Matlock.  The prompt was a photo of a pumpkin patch and the above pic reminded me of my post for that week since it also involved zucchini.  If you are interested, you can find it here.

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Holy Chocolate Cappuccino Cheesecake, Batman!

As promised in my post,  I Baked A Cake And Ate It, Too!, here's the recipe for that scrumpdelilicious cheesecake.  I've added some tips at the end but if you have any questions, please ask and I'll try to answer the best I can.

CHOCOLATE CAPPUCCINO CHEESECAKE

INGREDIENTS:

For the crust:
1 cup chocolate cookie crumbs
1/4 cup butter - melted
2 tblsp sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon

For the cake (two parts):
3 (8 oz) packages cream cheese, softened
1 cup sugar
3 eggs, room temperature
8 (1 oz) squares of semisweet baking chocolate, melted and cooled
2 tblsp whipping cream

1 cup sour cream
1/4 tsp salt
3 tsp instant coffee granules dissolved in 1/4 cup hot water
1/3 cup coffee liqueur (Kahlua or Tia Maria)
2 tsp vanilla extract

For the frosting:
1 cup heavy whipping cream
2 tblsp icing/confectioners sugar
2 tblsp coffee liqueur
2 tblsp chocolate syrup

DIRECTIONS:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter (or grease) one 9” springform pan.
• Combine chocolate cookie crumbs, softened butter, sugar and cinnamon. Mix well and press into the buttered springform pan. (1)
• In a medium sized bowl, beat the softened cream cheese until smooth. Gradually add the 1 cup of sugar, mixing until well blended. Add eggs, one at a time. Beat at low speed until very smooth. (2)
• Melt the semisweet chocolate in a microwave (intervals of 30 seconds on high – stirring between cycles). Once melted and smooth, let cool before adding to main batter.
• Stir melted chocolate and 2 tablespoons of whipping cream to cream cheese mixture and blend well. Stir in sour cream, salt, coffee, 1/3 cup coffee liqueur and vanilla. Beat until smooth. Pour mixture into pan. (3 & 4)
• Bake in the centre of the oven at 350 degrees for 45 minutes. The centre will be soft but firm up when chilled. Leave cake in oven with the heat turned off and the door ajar for 45 minutes. Remove cake and chill in refrigerator. (5)

For the frosting:

Beat 1 cup of whipping cream until soft peaks form, then beat in the icing sugar, liqueur and syrup. Spread topping on chilled cake. (6)


Tips and Tweaks:

(1) Since I did not have the cookie crumbs and being my lazy-ass self, I used two pre-made, store bought chocolate crusts (Oreo), then crumbled them with some melted (or softened) butter to set the crumbs for the crust into the bottom of the pan. In hindsight, I might have used the butter-and-flour method (using the crumbs in place of the flour) to coat the sides of the pan as opposed to trying to press the crust up the sides of the pan. Or you could just dispense with a side crust altogether.

(2) I have a Kitchen Aid mixer with a large bowl and the attachments tend not to reach the shallowest parts of the bowl. While beating the cream cheese (regardless of your mixer), occasionally scrape the sides, but mostly the bottom and your mixing attachment(s) with a rubber spatula to make sure all the cheese becomes incorporated with the batter which should, hopefully, eliminate any tiny lumps of cheese (or if you really want to go the extra mile and you are a masochistic narcissistic baker, you could push the batter through a sieve to eliminate the bumps and zits). But it’s always a good idea to add the separate ingredients before turning the power back on to the mixer.

(3) You can use ground coffee instead of instant, just make it strong. And if you are really into espresso (or cappuccino), the stronger the better!

(4) Once all of the batter ingredients are well blended and just before you pour it into the crust, whip it – whip it good! (Sorry for that earworm.) This will help the mousse-like texture of the cake.

(5) To prevent cracks in the cake, place a shallow pan of water in the oven. This is not always successful in preventing cracks but they (the cracks) are easily covered up with topping. If you see a crack developing after 30 - 35 minutes of baking, turn off the oven, leave the door closed for about 10 to 20 minutes then leave the oven door ajar for about 45 minutes.

(6) If you are going to use the whipped cream topping, make sure the cream is very cold (but do not freeze it), and that the bowl is chilled before whipping. I set my bowl in an ice bath while whipping (and it does take some time to whip).  Else, you could use a cherry pie filling or other topping of your choice. I might try a meringue topping next time.

I really hope some of you try and enjoy this recipe.

The recipe for March is Creamy Zucchini Soup.  Stay tuned.

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I Baked A Cake And Ate It, Too!

Having been busy with the poopettes, another visitor - this time from Canada and who also happens to be Murphy's mom - and being a bit laid up with more stomach problems, it was my birthday in late February and, as if I didn't already have enough to do,  I had to make my own birthday cake!  Really??

Sheesh!

Well, not really - I mean I really did make a cake but it wasn't just necessarily for my birthday. In late 2010 I won a calendar from the wonderfully cheesy people at  WWFC (that would be Nicky, CheesyMike and Sme Jepeto), with each month in the calendar featuring a different recipe with cheese as an ingredient.

February's recipe was (is):

HOLY CHOCOLATE CAPPUCCINO CHEESECAKE, BATMAN!

Okay, delete the "Holy" and "Batman" from the above and that gives you name of the recipe.  If you are a lover of cheesecake, especially CHOCOLATE cheesecake, this is a great recipe and relatively simple, too! The only problem I had was with the springform pan: I usually cheat and use the store bought crusts but the ingredients were such that they called for a larger vessel. I did, however, use the pre-fab crusts for the cookie crumbs which was way easier than scraping the cream filling off of chocolate cookies (we don’t have just plain chocolate cookies here) and then crushing them. Hey, the easier the better, right?

Since I am not much of a sweets fan, I was going to forgo the topping but the cake developed a crack (and, apparently, some teeth, zits and attitude) while baking:

Eat me.

As you can see, I had no idea what I was doing slightly overdosed on the crumbs for the side crust (I really didn’t know if I was supposed to do that or not - a side crust, that is) which shrank inward, making the cake look kind of like a flattened curling rock (and I mean the sport of curling, not hair curling unless you use rocks to curl your hair - hey, whatever floats your boat).  Regardless of its appearance, the cake was lighter than a regular cheesecake - almost mousse like - and definitely fabulous!

So, here it is in all its glory, the finished product:

Happy Frakken Birthday To ME!!!

In hindsight, I probably could have gone with a meringue topping but that may have been just as sweet as the icing the recipe called for.  Hmm … maybe cherry pie filling for the schmear next time. Yum!

Instead of including the recipe here, I will post it in the next few days with some tips and tweaks (i.e. so your cake won't grow 'teeth' if it develops a crack, etc.).

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Will I Ever Post Again?

Since the arrival of the Poopettes one week ago, I've been busy looking after them, trying to do daily chores without stepping on them at every turn and ensuring they don't become puppy chow for our larger dogs.

My daily routine hasn't been very routine in the past week and I barely have time to read and/or comment on many blogs, let alone trying to write a post myself, so I apologize for lack of appearances.

Back in November, I won a calendar in a  'name that cheese' contest from Nicky and friends at We Work For Cheese.  The calendar contains recipes for cheese dishes, one for each month of the year, and I promised Nicky that I would try each and every recipe.  January called for cheese rolls.  Great.  My bread making skills are severely lacking, particularly in the moist and rising departments (not a euphemism).  I followed the recipe to the letter but the rolls didn't come out as cheesy as I was expecting although that could have been my fault in determining if it was supposed to be a 1/4 cup of cheese, grated or a 1/4 cup of grated cheese:  in baking, this apparently makes a difference.  Also, bread does not like me - if I merely pick up a glazing brush, my bread falls even before I get near it with the egg wash.  The rolls were good, bigger than they should have been, but they dried out after a couple of days.  I blame it on the climate and our sea level or, maybe, I just suck at it.  No worries, I'm looking forward to this month's recipe:  Chocolate Cappuccino Cheesecake!

In other news, I recently won an award for a caption contest hosted by vicki (aka vickilikesfrogs), a very funny and snarkastic blogger, at Glitter Frog.  Her contest is presently on sabbatical but will return soon. Check her out when you can.

Thank-you vicki!!

We are experiencing a mini heatwave right now - I am sooo not looking forward to summer - but I feel sorry for all of you who are stuck in the cold weather, particularly those in the northeast, for having to endure all of that snow.  So, in the hope of bringing a bit of levity to your situation, my cousin (who is a 'custodian' himself) sent me this link:  Janitor's Revenge.  I hope it makes you smile.

Now, I have to get back to chores.
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