It's No Wonder I Can't Write Comprehensively...

... when I read shit like this in our newspapers:

Evidently, there were four victims.  A couple aren't quite dead yet.

"Maria ... I Just Met a Cheese Named Maria"

Okay, so I don’t know if there is a cheese named “Maria” but I do know there is a storm named Maria which could be a potential threat to the Bahamas.   So far the forecast is leaning in our favour – she should be a gutter ball - but I can’t get that song out of my mind. 

Really.

Every time I visit the storm site, there she is and damn it if that song doesn’t pop into my head.

If you think about it, Maria is kind of a cheesy song anyway.

Speaking of cheese …

I’ve neglected my monthly Cheese Calendar reviews* and in order to get my mind off Maria - the storm, not to mention the song - I now update you with my late reviews of the July and August recipes for the calendar.

*(If you are new to my blog and have no idea what I'm talking about, click here to get a general understanding of the Cheese Calendar, or just click on the 'cheese calendar' label below.)

Kiwi Mascarpone  (July)

Ingredients:

• 6 kiwis (the fruit kind – not actual New Zealanders, unless your into that sort of thing)
• 1/3 cup orange juice
• ¼ cup mascarpone cheese
• 1 tsp honey
• ¼ tsp cinnamon

 Directions:

• Peel and slice the kiwis into rounds.  Sprinkle orange juice over fruit and set aside.
• In a small bowl, mix mascarpone, honey and cinnamon until well blended.
• Layer kiwis and mascarpone into ramekins 3 times, ending with kiwis.  Sprinkle tops with a pinch of cinnamon.

Oh, yum!  This would make a great dessert for any meal.  It’s not very heavy on the “cheese” taste but the mascarpone, with the honey and the cinnamon, compliments the kiwis very nicely.  It would also be an appropriate dessert for the following recipe.

Note:  If you are going to use the other Kiwis (real New Zealanders), just make they have been washed and are clean shaven, substitute the orange juice with a hot tub full of Orange Jello, whipped cream for the mascarpone and ... oh, never mind.

Goat Cheese Quesadillas  (August)

Ingredients:

• 2 tblsp extra virgin olive oil, divided
• ½ pound fresh asparagus, cut into 1 ½ inch pieces
• Two 10-inch flour tortillas (I used three 8-inch tortillas)
• 4 oz herbed goat cheese (or slightly more if you use the 8-inch wraps)
• ½ cup cooked ham, cubed (I used Black Forest ham, cut into quarter-inch cubes)

Directions:

• In a skillet, heat 1 tblsp of olive oil over medium-low heat.  Add the asparagus, stirring occasionally until tender and lightly browned.**  Add salt and pepper to taste.  Set aside.
• Spread one side of each torilla with ½ of the goat cheese.  Spread ½ the asparagus and ½ of the cooked ham cubes evenly on each tortilla.  Fold tortilla in half over contents.  Brush the outsides of the quesadillas with remaining oil.
• Over medium-high heat, cook the quesadillas about 2 to 3 minutes per side.  Cut in half and serve.

**Note:  I sometimes cannot get very fresh asparagus (as it was in this case), so I lowered the heat a bit, added a tablespoon of water and covered the skillet with a lid to steam the asparagus to prevent them from drying out.

Yum, again!  This is a simple, easy peasy recipe if you don’t want to do a lot of cooking, especially in the summertime.  The ingredients are simple (and I did adhere to the recipe), but one can always add other stuffings or seasonings to taste.  I also liked the bit of crunch that came from toasting the wraps in the skillet.

Well, that wraps up these recipes.  September's recipe is apple Camembert stuffed crepes.

Are They Sirius?

I don't know about you, but one would think that a "meteorologist" deals with things like, say, planets, stars and - god forbid - actual meteors.  Apparently not.   "Meteorologist" is the official job description of one who predicts or forecasts the weather.  Predilection is, as a science, iffy at best.  Hell, most people already pooh-pooh psychics, yet the "meteorologist" moniker given to - gasp! - weathermen is to be revered:   we are supposed to trust these people when it comes to the weather.

If you ask me, it's the name given to those idiots who go out and report on a hurricane in the bloody middle of it.  I'll have to say, though, that those meteorologists on the beaches of the eastern U.S. seaboard kept me quite entertained during Hurricane Irene.

Speaking of being entertained, I can't imagine that the job is otherwise very interesting.  Boring, actually.  So it doesn't surprise me that those guys at the hurricane centre might hope to have something upon which to report for six months of the year.  (One has to wonder what they do for the other six months.)  And, if it's a 'slow' year, how do they spend their time?

They probably sit around thinking of "headlines" like this:

Evidently, a bored meteorologist has been channeling Howard Cosell.

I'm waiting for the third round update.

;-)